Has the diagnosed attention span of a goldfish

Jul 15


imagine a vampire going “fuck it” and just taking some antihistamines before going to town on a plate of garlic bread

later on it’s wheeled into the ER with like a puffed up face and it just goes “I have been on this earth 10 thousand years but i have not lived until this day”

(via zetablarian)



i hate when i read an amazing, game-changing fic by an author and go to their profile, eyes a-twinkle, and


(via duendecillita)



i like to imagine natasha dates all the ladies she tries to set steve up with first to make sure they’re okay. because fuck if she’s not going to do her due diligence. 

natasha dating all the ladies. natasha dating kristen from statistics who confides in her that she’s always had a crush on captain america. natasha dating lillian with the lip piercing from accounting who is cute and likes to grow succulents. 

steve liking another shield agent and wondering if he should ask her out maybe and natasha flying down from the rafters to tell him that she’s not in a place for real relationship right now and steve just “…..???? how do you know” and natasha evades the question by punching bad guys in the face

natasha dating sharon and accidentally liking her a lot but being a big goof and not really realizing it. sharon going on extremely platonic dates with steve and them being good friends and natasha taking it as a personal affront to her matchmaking skills which are flawless, thank you very much

and she finally confronts sharon about it and sharon’s like i’m not dating him because i’m dating you, dumbass. now come here and help me sharpen my knives.

and natasha’s just “:>” and does and they smooch forever the end


(via confused-android)


why do teenage girls hang out in odd numbers?

because they can’t even

(via confused-android)



these are the facts people

(via confused-android)





he tried to help




he tried to help


(Source: justbecats, via duendecillita)


chead said: hey what's up with the "!" in fandoms? i.e. "fat!<thing>" just curious thaxxx <3










I have asked this myself in the past and never gotten an answer.

Maybe today will be the day we are both finally enlightened.

woodsgotweird said: man i just jumped on the bandwagon because i am a sheep. i have no idea where it came from and i ask myself this question all the time

Maybe someone made a typo and it just got out of hand?

I kinda feel like panic!at the disco started the whole exclamation point thing and then it caught on around the internet, but maybe they got it from somewhere else, IDK.

The world may never know…

Maybe it’s something mathematical?

I’ve been in fandom since *about* when Panic! formed and the adjective!character thing was already going strong, pretty sure it predates them.

It’s a way of referring to particular variations of (usually) a character — dark!Will, junkie!Sherlock, et cetera. I have suspected for a while that it originated from some archive system that didn’t accommodate spaces in its tags, so to make common interpretations/versions of the characters searchable, people started jamming the words together with an infix.

(Lately I’ve seen people use the ! notation when the suffix isn’t the full name, but is actually the second part of a common fandom portmanteau. This bothers me a lot but it happens, so it’s worth being aware of.)

"Bang paths" (! is called a "bang"when not used for emphasis) were the first addressing scheme for email, before modern automatic routing was set up. If you wanted to write a mail to the Steve here in Engineering, you just wrote "Steve" in the to: field and the computer sent it to the local account named Steve. But if it was Steve over in the physics department you wrote it to phys!Steve; the computer sent it to the "phys" computer, which sent it in turn to the Steve account. To get Steve in the Art department over at NYU, you wrote NYU!art!Steve- your computer sends it to the NYU gateway computer sends it to the "art" computer sends it to the Steve account. Etc. ("Bang"s were just chosen because they were on the keyboard, not too visually noisy, and not used for a huge lot already).

It became pretty standard jargon, as I understand, to disambiguate when writing to other humans. First phys!Steve vs the Steve right next to you, just like you were taking to the machine, then getting looser (as jargon does) to reference, say, bearded!Steve vs bald!Steve.

So I’m guessing alternate character version tags probably came from that.

I thought it came from “!” in computer programming meaning “not” (because it’s usually used for things the character is not in canon, like Slytherin!Harry) but this makes way more sense.